I don't know how my mom put the fear of doing something wrong in me. She never hit me. Well, there was that time she threw a wooden spoon at me she happened to be washing at the sink, but me and my sassy mouth deserved it and more. I just never wanted to displease her. I still don't.
I don't think my mom understands me, but I'm not so sure about that either. I think she is proud of me to other people but she wants to keep my head from swelling so she doesn't brag on me to my face too much. Yesterday she told me that I am smart and for the life of me I can't remember why she said it. But I remember saying to her, "Well, I am smart enough to be persistent."
Was I smart for thinking she might like the Art Car Parade we went to? Or was it because I can put new phone numbers in her cell phone? Darn. I wish I could remember. I want to be smart in her eyes. I want to do good. I want to be the honorable, selfless, devoted, brilliant, self-reliant woman that she is and no matter how smart I am, I will never will be that daughter..
I love you Dorthea. You are the absolute Queen of my Heart and you are a treasure to me. Thanks for all your hard work and thankless times you sacrificed for me even when I was a little brat.